Fresca, the definition of refreshment

Have you ever been watching a commercial and after it ends, you think to yourself, man, I could have made a better, more effective, more entertaining end to that fucking commercial. I do it all the time. Mine have a common theme though. Take for example, that Prudential commercial, where that overweight cartoon retard rides his bike up to the big hole in the ground and looks around as if he is an overweight cartoon retard. Then he pushes the Prudential logo thing shaped like a triangle up to the hole, utilizing it as a ramp mechanism. Props overweight cartoon retard. However, the commercial loses all effectiveness for me when after a brief moment of anticipation, fat retard clears the ravine and lands safely on the other side. Now, you cant tell me that you werent hoping for his bike to blow a tire while approaching the take off ramp causing him to second guess his ever approaching jump but realizing it was too late to turn back and while hitting the ramp at dangerously low speeds his non gasoline powered pedal bike somehow manages to burst into flames sending him streaking through the skies, on fire, almost giving you a sense of Nostalgia as you think back to your days as a teeneager at Pizza Hut, and just when you think hes gonna make it, as you wipe away the emotion from the last 10 seconds which has been cinema at its finest, the flaming Schwinn, with Captain Retard on board, come up a mere 2 feet short, smashing into the wall of the ravine, and decending into the unknown below. Then, to top it off, because at this point were all at the edge of our seats waiting for some sort of closure, all that flashes across the screen is, Prudential....Fuck you. In an outrage, we scramble to our computers, to our phones, and call everyone we know. "Did you just see that". Angry phone calls flood in at Prudential Inc. demanding for a safe return of the cartoon retard. T-shirts are sold by the millions, and overnight, the cute cuddly character that is the cartoon retard becomes a celebrity. Now, wouldnt that be a much more effective ending to that commerical. Because ask yourself, do you even know what Prudential does? I sure as hell dont.